Mercredi with 279 418 notes / reblog
Mercredi with 10 604 notes / reblog

amporeon:

basedmadoka:

an erotic poem:

leg so hot

hot hot leg

leg so hot u fry an eg

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I HAVE WAITED FOR SO LONG TO FIND THIS AGAIN

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Mercredi with 37 347 notes / reblog
zoewashburne:

i’m really glad you guys understand how important this is

mister-smalls:

nylooms:

tupacabra:

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it’s a metaphor

The best part is that the crab is the symbol for the zodiac sign Cancer, so in a way even the crab itself is a metaphor

The Fault in our (Lob)Stars

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stereofeathers:

stereofeathers:

stereofeathers:

stereofeathers:

FUCK I FORGOT THAT THE BIRD STORE I WORK AT HAS ONE BABY BIRD THAT LIKES TO SLEEP IN PEOPLES POCKETS IM HOME AND SOMETHING IS MOVING IN MY POCKET OH FUCK


YEAH ITS THE BIRD I JUST ACCIDENTALLY STOLE A BIRD

 MY BOSS JUST GAVE ME THE MOST STERN LOOK OF DISAPPROVAL BEFORE HE STARTED LAUGHING SO HARD HE HAD TO GRAB THE EDGE OF A TABLE

NO GOD PLEASE DONT LET THIS BE THE POST THAT MAKES ME TUMBLR FAMOUS

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stoutshady:

emmetbrickowskivevo:

stoutshady:

once i accidentally called 999 and my brother was shouting “im gonna kill you” at his video game in the background and to cut a long story short 20 minutes later 2 police officers showed up at my house to check out a potential murder and this is why i hate my life

I think it’s 911…

i think i live in england…

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ectolime:

clay-phoenix:

leo-arcana:

lil-weezing:

ask-flameprince:

ask-alex-the-vampire-princess:

arthur-christmas-claus:

auspisstice:

ferlmao:

himapapaftw:

blackmormon:

i think Paulina from danny phantom is the older Trixie tang

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I wouldn’t be surprised

Woah woah woah, that means

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whA T

HEADCANON ACCEPTED

Can we please not forget about this? 

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Wait then what if

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i cannot accept this

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WHAT THE FRICK IS GOING ON

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friends forever

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Mercredi with 213 958 notes / reblog
kayleyhyde:

we all know that feeling, vending machine
Anonyme: I'm at work and I'm about to cry. I don't want to cry, can you say something funny?

xekstrin:

mylife-beliike:

i-do-it-for-the-lesbians:

ONE TIME AT SCHOOL LET ME REMIND YOU I GO TO AN ALL GIRLS CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL SO THEY ALL WEAR SHOIRT ASS SKIRTS OKAY SO ONE TIME THIS GIRL LIKE TRIPPED AND HER SKIRT FLEW UP AND MY FRIEND WAS LIKE TIFFANH GO FUCKING HELP HER UP AND I WAS LIKE PARALYZED STARING AT HER ASS AND THEN MY FRIEND WAS LIKE FUCKING SHIT TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN AND SHE LITERALLY HIT ME WITH A BIBLE AND I HAVE NO REGRETS NONE

This kills me every time

"TIFFANY YOU USELESS LESBIAN"

king-of-westeros:

kingofwesteros:

in the game of urls you win or you hyphen

you’re telling me mate

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Okay, so i just have to fucking point this out…

lindsaychrist:

samanthakaynielsen:

This little girl

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Is going to grow up

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And find out

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About all of these

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And spend her life

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Wondering

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What the fuck happened

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Because you little shits

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Cannot contain yoursleves

oh my god

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rapunzelie:

chocolatemermaidya:

rapunzelie:

do you ever feel like there’s just so many pretty girls but most dudes are just subpar like there are radiant goddesses everywhere and just piles and piles of guys in backwards baseball caps and sandals

it’s called makeup

you can put eyeliner on a frat boy that doesn’t change the fact that’s he’s wearing a neon muscle shirt and nike flip flops

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ladynecro:

my friend has black hair and the initials PM while her boyfriend has blonde hair and the initials AM and she told me that they joke that theyre ‘as different as night and day’ and i fell on the floor that shit was so adorable

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